renewal
The ancient tales run like nectar from your tongue I drink you in Your elixir of joys and sorrows Places unseen and lovers unmet I can taste it all upon your breath I drink you in
My own private pantheon
pantheon noun pan-the-on a temple dedicated to all the gods I have a regular Mount Olympus in my mind. All the gods of me are constantly arguing, gambling and wreaking havoc in my tiny temple. I need them to get along and play nicely with each other so I can make some real progress in
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What is lost? (revisited)
What is lost? In less than six months I’ve managed to lose one child to death, one child to a long-overdue change in custody and one child to my own unreasonable and unhealthy expectations. I’ve found and lost a roommate (though I’m awfully glad he’s gone) and lost two cats; one to life with her
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Warning: my first time
TW. Seriously, this is not a pretty tale. My first sexual encounter, age 3.
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parents
It’s been an odd week. I just spent the first Saturday at home in over 2 months, between weddings and festival, my summer gets busy fast. I’ve also been working on an exercise for days now and I just can’t seem to complete it. Who knew my parents would be so much trouble?
spring cleaning
October is always an emotional month for me. My father’s mother’s birthday fell on October 1st and I loved my grandma, especially since both my sister and I had our birthdays in October, so it made it extra special. Then my sister had her first baby in October too which has always been awesome. This
What is lost?
I started seeing a counselor in February when I saw B in her car again and realized where this was headed and how powerless I was to stop it. That counselor was like a love-struck junior cheerleader who did little but encourage me to talk and cheer me on. Her utter uselessness was recognized by
Darling mine
Adapted from a work by Tyler Knott Gregson ~*~ Darling mine, I see you walk past the mirror, unwilling to look at yourself. I hear the poisonous lies you tell yourself about yourself.
goddess
My 23-year-old independent, talented and beautiful daughter was the goddess to me. From the moment she was born with the female bits instead of the other ones, every movement, every breath, every bellow of frustration seems to come from the center of perfect femininity. My darling Faerin.
Idiot
Idiot. It’s a term of endearment, really. Fae was very proud of her status as a professional idiot, it meant the world to her, and to me. Going back to B after the incident in January made her an idiot too. Thinking for even one fleeting second about ending her beautiful life makes her an