Category: Faerin

November 1, 2016 / Faerin
May 3, 2016 / Faerin

This is not intended for anyone who can’t be compassionate toward a mother grieving her daughter’s suicide.

April 17, 2016 / Faerin
March 18, 2016 / Faerin

I am a Midwestern mom who speaks nothing but English and holds a virgin passport. So why am I going to Seoul, Korea to watch a French musical next month?

September 25, 2015 / Faerin

I started seeing a counselor in February when I saw B in her car again and realized where this was headed and how powerless I was to stop it. That counselor was like a love struck junior cheerleader who did little but encourage me to talk and cheer me on. Her utter uselessness was recognized by my son, Ben, when he came to a session with me after Faerin passed. I fired her in June.

September 18, 2015 / Faerin

Idiot. It’s a term of endearment, really. Fae was very proud of her status as a professional idiot, it meant the world to her, and to me. Going back to B after the incident in January made her an idiot too. Thinking for even one fleeting second about ending her beautiful life makes her an idiot as well.

But losing her made me an idiot. A mindless, empty, lost idiot without enough sense to even watch TV. My promotion was sudden and unexpected but thankfully only parts of it appear to have been permanent.

September 17, 2015 / Faerin

You may or may not know that when a human hears of another human’s death, a very common response it to ask, “What happened?” I asked the police officer in my living room, after I caught my breath.

I didn’t break down, I didn’t gasp or shriek or faint or any of those things. I knew. I’d known she was a t risk, I just thought I’d have more time to help free her. I knew and I swallowed hard and I put my hands over my mouth and I asked, “What happened?” They didn’t know. They knew she was dead, they knew she died in Grand Ledge, they had a form for me to fill out giving the Grand Ledge police permission to search the car. That was it. Everything beyond that was a mystery.

September 16, 2015 / Faerin

The first thing I put in my journal after Faerin died. When they come To…

May 31, 2015 / Faerin

If you tried to contact me recently, you may have been redirected to one of my associates instead.

On Tuesday May 19th the Lansing police informed me that my oldest child and only daughter, Faerin, age 23, was deceased. When I asked them what happened, I had to wait 16 hours before I was able to get someone to answer that question for me.