A Sample Wedding Ceremony
Just one of the many variations of a wedding ceremony that Sister Kya has helped couples write and perform.
Officiant: Family and friends, welcome to the blending of two hearts and two lives into one beautiful whole. [Bride] and [Groom] have long planned and anticipated this event and they will remember this day, and your supportive presence here, for the rest of their lives. They have expressed their love to each other every day for many months in private, but today is special because today they will express and vow their love for each other in front of you. Without you, this moment would not exist and we are all grateful to you for gracing us with your presence.
We also welcome the presence of God who has chosen to bless this couple with faithfullness and protection on this day and every day. Without the life that flows to and through us from the Divine Source, we would not be able to experience this wedding, today's fellowship or any of the other blessings bestowed upon us in this world. We are grateful for and humbled by the gifts of life and love that we celebrate here today.
[Bride] and [Groom], you have waited for this moment, planned for this moment and worked towards this moment for a long time. Now I ask that you simply be in this moment. I’m going to be silent while you, while all of us, stop thinking about where we are going to be in the future and simply celebrate where we are right now. This is the moment you planned for, take a few deep breaths right now and enjoy your wedding!
(Moment of silence)
Officiant: [Groom], you did not come to be here without the love and support of others. You were born into this world and were nurtured and protected as you grew into the strong and capable man you now are. Who so loved the boy that he, in time, became this man?
Family of the Groom: We did and we do.
Officiant: And are you now willing to share your son that he may join this woman and will you now embrace her as your daughter?
Family of the Groom: We are.
Groom: Thank you for your love, your support and your blessings on my marriage to [Bride] whom I love.
Bride: Thank you for your love, your support and your gift of [Groom] whom I love.
Officiant: [Bride], you did not come to be here without the love and support of others. You were born into this world and you were nurtured and protected as you grew into the strong and capable woman you now are. Who so loved the girl that she, in time, became this woman?
Family of the Bride: We did and we do.
Officiant: And are you now willing to share your daughter that she may join this man and will you now embrace him as your son?
Family of the Groom: We are.
Bride: Thank you for your love, your support and your blessings on my marriage to [Groom] whom I love.
Groom: Thank you for your love, your support and your gift of [Bride] whom I love.
(Optional readings, songs or comments on the nature of love and marriage)
(Vows of love and commitment either recited, read from cards or read by Officiant and responded to with "I do")
Officiant: May I have the rings please?
The wedding ring is a complete and perfect circle with no end and no beginning. It is the symbol of both the universe we are all a part of and of your love and commitment to each other. The giving and receiving of these rings will bind you both to the vows you have made.
(In Prayer) Creator of All, thank you for blessing these rings. May they serve to always remind [Bride] and [Groom] of the promises they have made to each other today. May your endless love and boundless wisdom surround these rings, these two before me and all of those gathered to witness this exchange today. In your name, we pray. Amen.
Groom: [Bride], please accept this ring as an constant symbol of my vows,. I offer it with all that I am, all that I have and all that I will ever be. May I love you, honor you and respect you, for as long as we both shall live.
(Groom places ring on Bride’s finger)
Bride: [Groom], please accept this ring as an constant symbol of my vows,. I offer it with all that I am, all that I have and all that I will ever be. May I love you, honor you and respect you, for as long as we both shall live.
(Bride places ring on Groom’s finger)
Officiant: You have each received the blessings of your families. You have vowed to love each other. You have offered and accepted rings to wear as a symbol of those vows. And you have done this all in the presence and company of your dearest friends and most beloved family. It is now my most humble honor to declare to you and all those assembled here that you are now, legally and spiritually, husband and wife.
You may now enjoy the first kiss of your long and fruitful marriage.
Ladies and Gentlemen, please congratulate Mr. and Mrs. _______ (or however the couple wishes to be addressed)
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Unity Ceremonies
The most common unity ceremony is the lighting of the Unity Candle, but there are several to choose from including:
Binding or Handfasting
A traditional Handfasting is actually a formal engagement ritual, not really a wedding, but modern couples who prefer the symbolic binding of their hands to other unity ceremonies are adding this ritual to their weddings more and more frequently.
Handfasting rituals vary a great deal in wording, but the basic image is that of a Bride and Groom's hands being gently wrapped with ribbons or cords that represent the bonds of love. This tradition is the source of the phrase "tying the knot", though securing the bonds with a "lover's knot" is not always desired.
For traditional Celtic or Neo-Pagan couples, I can perform a "traditional" handfasting, either for the standard year and a day or as a lifetime binding.
Rose Ceremony
Roses have been used to convey feelings of love for centuries. Many wedding ceremonies incorporate this symbology in various ways. Often the Bride and/or Groom will present a rose to their mothers as a way of honoring them. Sometimes roses are used to represent family or friends who are unable to attend the ceremony, especially those who have passed on recently. Roses can be used in all sorts of ways, but the "Rose Ceremony" described here uses them as the first gift exchanged between a husband and a wife. I've written an adaptation of a "traditional" script for this ceremony here.
Unity Candle
Two taper candles are used to represent the bride and groom as individuals and a pillar candle is used to represent the entity they create together the "marriage".
Blending of Sands
This ceremony holds the same significance as the Unity Candle ceremony, but it is better suited to outdoor weddings on windy days and weddings of parents who want to include their children in the "unity act".
Sand is used to represent the Bride and Groom and anyone else participating. Many couples like to represent God or Spirituality or Love as well. Each person (with the officiant standing in for God) holds a small container of sand that represents them, then all participants pour their sand into a larger container that is used to represent the combined family.
Wine Ceremony
Another blending ritual, this one with wine instead of sand. It is rumored that this tradition began in France whenever the children of two vineyard owners married.
Again, the Bride and Groom are represented by separate containers, this time they are small decanters of wine. Traditionally, the Bride is symbolized by white wine and the Groom with red, though many couples choose wines based on their individual wine preferences and not on color or tradition. Each pours their wine into a single glass and then both drink from it. This represents both the blending and the accepting of each other.
Hand Ceremony
This ceremony is a little different from the others above. It has less of a unity/ blending meaning and more of a love and acceptance meaning. It can be extremely powerful and, due to its relative rarity, it has the potential of bringing tears to the eyes of guests who haven't seen it before.
Again, of course there are many variations, but they are pretty much all reflected in the script used for the ceremony. It asks that the Bride hold the Grooms hands in hers then the officiant describes his hands as they will support her throughout their marriage. She then blesses each of his palms with a kiss, before he takes her hands in his and the officiant describes her hands to him in a similar way.
Ring Warming
The wedding rings are secured together with a ribbon or in a small bag and passed to each guest in turn. The guest with the rings gets the opportunity to offer a prayer, blessing or wish for the wedding couple, either silently or aloud. In this manner the rings are "warmed" with good thoughts before being returned to the officiant and either blessed or simply handed to the Bride and Groom to exchange with each other.
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My Couples Say:
"We got so many comments on our ceremony. Everyone loved it! Thanks!"
Jennifer and Andrew -
Married October 4, 2008